COVER STORY

WHERE’S YOUR MIND TAKING YOU?

Mindfulness is living in the moment non-judgementally. Fully alive, fully awakened, involving all your senses. Paying attention on purpose. Image credit: ANDREA PIACQUADIO on Pexels.

By SHAGORIKA EASWAR

A fun evening with her boyfriend turned into a nightmare when things spun out of control and he called the cops.

In trouble with the law, her anxiety spiralling about what her colleagues and friends would make of it, the young woman could barely think coherently by the time she reached out for help.

“I should have seen the signs, I should have stopped,” she repeated nonstop, berating herself.

Latchman Narain told her she should stop with the shoulda, coulda.

“Cognitive behaviour therapy challenges some of the ideas we have about ourselves,” he says. “It’s not about what is right or wrong, but about finding a solution, about understanding that one cannot now go ‘should have’. One cannot go back to the past to fix something. So we replace regret with hope. You have to acknowledge your emotions while using cognition to resolve issues, find ways to rise above what happened.”

Narain is a registered psychotherapist and member of the Ontario Association of Mental Health Professional (OAMHP) and the College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario (CRPO), with a doctorate in Counselling Psychology. He also has a diploma in Cross Cultural Counselling from St. John’s University, New York City, and has been practising in the field of family counselling for the past twenty-plus years, specializing in the areas of anger management and domestic partner assault since 2000. He is a mindfulness and meditation teacher in the Vipassana tradition, which informs his psychotherapy practice.

His extensive experience in the practice of mindfulness, mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) techniques and cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) has aided many clients in making positive changes in their lives.

Mindfulness can, he asserts, help in multiple areas, in everything from anger management and addictions to spousal abuse. It can also help in areas one may not associate with psychotherapy.

Financial problems, for instance.

“A lot of people are struggling financially. That can lead to conflict with spouse, legal issues, being unable to focus at work. They are all connected and lead to stress, anxiety, depression, leaving a person feeling overwhelmed.”

He starts them off with mindful breathing. Then when they are calmer, he has them write down their expenses in one column and income in another. He asks them to consider what they can do to reduce some of the expenses, or what steps, if any, they can take to increase income. While helping clients acknowledge and address feelings to deal with emotions, he uses a solution-focused approach to help resolve issues that may have caused the anxiety.

In the case of spousal abuse, it can help both the victim and the perpetrator.

“Femicide is not just an act, it’s a mentality,” says Narain. “In Guyana where I grew up, a man might beat up his wife for talking to another man, she could die. Mindfulness is not a panacea, but used together with education, it can address the root cause of anger.

“There’s the emotional aspect, feelings of depression and or regret, and then there’s the practical aspect,” says Narain. “Sometimes people are so engulfed with emotions that they are unable to think clearly about steps they can take to resolve issues. They are unable to break the vicious cycle of constant thought – that’s what anxiety is, a runaway train of thoughts. I help them, little by little, baby steps, to sort through that avalanche of feelings. As they talk, as they verbalise their issues, they begin to feel more hopeful.

“It always makes a difference. More in some, less in others, but mindfulness helps manage emotional disregulation in all of these.”

Research from the Conference Board of Canada shows an increase in employee stress and other mental health-related challenges during the pandemic. A report found that the percentage of Canadian employees reporting positive mental health dropped from 69 per cent pre-pandemic to 47 per cent in February 2022. Reasons for this decrease in employee mental health throughout the COVID-19 pandemic include increased workload, overwhelming and unsustainable work, and difficulty managing home and work life at the same time.

Narain saw a spike in need for psychotherapy, too.

“Anxiety is a runaway train of thoughts. But your thoughts are not you.” – Dr Latchman Narain.

He talks about the client who came in shaking and incoherent. Narain told him to sit on the yoga mat in his office and follow his breath.

“Don’t think. Don’t talk. We’ll talk later. After 10 minutes, the man gets up and says, ‘This is working! This is working!’”

But what, exactly, is mindfulness? While some of us have some understanding of it, many struggle to wrap our heads around it.

Mindfulness is living in the moment non-judgementally, explains Narain. Fully alive, fully awakened, involving all your senses. Paying attention on purpose.

He shares a story about the Buddha.

“One day, the Buddha was sitting, holding a rose in his hands with disciples around him, waiting for the wisdom he would impart. Suddenly, one of the disciples laughed. And the Buddha said, he got the lesson, he enjoyed the experience by fully immersing himself in it.

“Let’s say I want to be mindful at this moment in my garden. When I look at a rose, I should really see it, not compare it to another bloom, not see the aphids... Not allow the past nor the future to influence the moment.”

So ancient Eastern practices such as meditation and Vipassana are mindfulness or are they parallel schools of thought?

Mindfulness is rooted in Hindu and Buddhist traditions, says Narain.

“It is called samma sati or right mindfulness. But Jon Kabat-Zinn, the founder of the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School,  helped make it mainstream.

“He studied under Thich Nhat Hanh, the Vietnamese Buddhist monk, historically recognized as the main inspiration for engaged Buddhism and the ‘father of mindfulness’. He went to India and Tibet and learned and practised mindful breathing, walking, eating. On his return to the US, he integrated it in Western psychotherapy. Patients with chronic back pain who couldn’t get relief from painkillers were helped by Vipassana. It didn’t cure the pain, but alleviated it, made it more manageable. Kabat-Zinn’s studies showed improvement in physiology and in the ability to deal with stress. He wrote a book called Full Catastrophe Living.

“Mindfulness has existed for thousands of years, but it was ignored, even made fun of. It took a Caucasian professor’s work at the University of Massachusetts to achieve consistent growth in awareness about mindfulness. It came to the West through psychotherapy.”

The mindfulness revolution, as it came to be known, with books being revised now to integrate mindfulness, is a result of the empirical evidence he found. There are thousands of studies pointing to the efficacy of mindfulness.

Narain was introduced to mindfulness-based practices in grad school.

“It was really big those days, like a new discovery! Professor Paul Koziey would say, ‘Out of your mind, into your senses,’ and we would go, whaaat?” recalls Narain with a chuckle. “But now one of the things I do with my clients is ask them to name three things they can see, two things they can hear and one thing they can feel, to make them more aware through their senses.”

When an anxious client calls, he tells him to sit up, maintain a straight posture, close his eyes, and take a deep breath. To follow the breath in all the way and then follow the breath out all the way. Not to analyze it, just enjoy the breathing, feel it.

“Don’t identify with the emotion. Don’t allow your thinking to be fused to your being. Your thoughts are not you. Be aware of the separation – these are my thoughts, this is me. You know how Descartes says, ‘I think; therefore I am’? Mindfulness teaches I am, therefore I think. The I is pure consciousness in Vedanta philosophy. Through mindfulness, you start looking at your thoughts, observing them, without identifying with them.”

But what if someone’s mind skitters in a dozen different directions at the same time, if the person is incapable of stilling their mind?

Narain responds by pointing to the difference between mindfulness meditation and traditional meditation. One doesn’t have to focus on an object or repeat a mantra.

“Try this, when you finish this interview,” he suggests. “Sit in your chair and follow your breath for half a minute – that’s a beginning. Everyone can do that!

“Awareness of one’s breath is usually the first step to being mindful because this brings your mind to the present moment. The overall effect of mindful living is that you develop increased awareness and with that a greater capacity to enjoy present moments and make conscious, healthier choices in your everyday life. In effect, mindfulness becomes a source of joy. You learn to manage your anger better. Your behaviour is no longer an automatic function of habitual thoughts, perceptions and feelings. Your stress levels decrease as you become more proactive in the sense that you have more control over the way you respond to situations. You become less reactive, that is to say, you develop less of a tendency to follow inappropriate habitual ways – automatic behaviours – of dealing with people and situations in your life.”

Happiness can only be found in the present, says Narain. If you bring yourself into the present, you are, in effect, creating your own happiness. If you go for a walk mindfully, you are creating happiness.

“Bring your five senses to the walk. Feel the sunshine, see the colours, hear the birds... when you eat, slow down and enjoy the meal. Yesterday, my wife made a great rice dish. Earlier, I might have wolfed it down but as I savoured each mouthful, I was happy, I was grateful. Even when I wash my hands, I feel the water against my palms, there is happiness in each sensation.”

Narain integrates both Eastern approaches and Western treatment models such as evidenced-based CBT and solution-focused therapy. Is it mix-and-match for all clients or one for some and the other for some? How does he decide what to go with for a particular client?

The models are applied within a holistic and culturally-appropriate context in a psycho-educational format, he says. His skill as a therapist lies in figuring out what will work best in which situation. And he always asks if the client is open to ideas outside of their faith.

As the Wikipedia page on Kabat-Zinn shows, mindfulness is now used in  medicine, psychology, health care, neuroscience, schools, higher education, business, social justice, criminal justice, prisons, the law, technology, the military, government, and professional sports and over 700 hospitals and medical centers around the world now offer MBSR.

But is it still, in some quarters, dismissed as the equivalent of sitting on a mountain top and praying for a cure?

“Western medicine and psychotherapy are based in drugs and there was reluctance to accept mindfulness which is based in Eastern traditions. But since Kabat-Zinn legitimized it, if you will, modern scientists today are incorporating it in their therapy. No one can deny the body of evidence that shows it works.

“I ask my clients of all the interventions which helped the most, and many say they benefited immensely from practising mindfulness.”

‘You are in a situation here and now, think about how you can best help yourself, not how others will judge you’. Image credit: NEWS CANADA.

The South Asian community is enmeshed in what people will say, how actions will be perceived by others, says Narain.

“Sometimes, it is my job to tell a client, ‘You are in a situation here and now, think about how you can best help yourself, not how others will judge you’. I treat them with a dose of love, with compassion.

“That goes against modern medicine’s ‘clinical approach’, but I care about my patients and I can see that it helps, knowing someone cares about you.”

• Latchman Narain founded the Anger Management Centre in 2000 to address the dire need for mental health services in the community. Considered by many to be the pre-eminent provider of anger and stress management counselling services in the Toronto area, the team has helped over 11,000 families.

Narain offers individual counselling for the Partner Assault Response Services (PARS) Program on an individual basis and also facilitates groups for adults with anger issues.

He has published counselling articles and facilitated many workshops in the field of counselling and mental health, including some for businesses and corporations. His areas of expertise include anger management, domestic violence, depression, anxiety, personal development and effective parenting. In addition, he presented a highly successful monthly seminar series Anger, Spirituality and Relationships at The Learning Annex in Toronto. He has facilitated training workshops for mental health coaches to equip them with the skills necessary when working with a vulnerable population through compassion, empathy, and active listening.

For more info, visit www.amct.ca.

“AS A MODEL AND PAGEANT QUEEN, LEARNING ABOUT AND PRACTISING MINDFULNESS HAS BEEN EXTREMELY BENEFICIAL”

“My journey with mindfulness began in 2021,” says Nikita Dani. Image credit: @RATHAURPORTRAITS. Makeup: @BEAUTAGEBEAUTY STUDIO, @MILD.STUDIOS.Dress: @SHAHANI_COUTURE.

By NIKITA DANI

There is scientific evidence that our brain can rewire itself, a term called neuroplasticity. When practised consistently, mindfulness can help reduce stress and anxiety, enhance self-awareness, and help cultivate positive emotions, essentially rewiring our brain.

As a model and pageant queen, learning about and practising mindfulness has been extremely beneficial – not only for my work, but also for my life. My journey with mindfulness began in 2021. I experienced anxiety through high school and university, which worsened over time. Eventually, I began implementing methods to improve my well-being. These methods included exercise, mindfulness, playing music, improved nutrition, spending time in nature, and more.

I also began training with Venki Raman, an executive coach practising Energy Leadership. He taught me that instead of making drastic changes, it is more effective to implement small changes consistently – coming back to neuroplasticity. I implemented this strategy first with my fitness routine and diet, then with my mindfulness practice. In our sessions, we often did deep breathing exercises, which left me with a feeling of calm and quiet. I practise these exercises even now. 

While competing for the title of Miss Southern Ontario 2022, I worked with former Miss Universe Natalie Glebova, and one of her modules focused on mindset. We practised various breathing techniques, and discussed other mindfulness practices that could help us stay calm and present while competing. After winning this pageant, I went on to compete at Miss World Canada 2022 where these practices were even more important. No matter how prepared I was, I knew it would be normal to get nervous. These mindfulness practices were able to pull me in to the present moment, allowing me to go into each area of competition calm and collected. Each night, I would listen to music – another way I practised mindfulness. At Miss World Canada 2022, I won both the talent and head-to-head challenge.

Last year, I was crowned Miss Eco Canada 2024. I will represent Canada at one of the largest international beauty pageants, Miss Eco International 2024 in Egypt.

My mindfulness practice has now become an important aspect of my life and work, and I will continue to apply these practices in my daily life and during pageants. 

With any skill, such as learning an instrument or sport, we need to work at it consistently, over time, to see changes. The same applies to our mind, and that consistency and focus is so worth it when it can lead to an overall healthier and happier life.