MEET MONICA
OUR THOUGHTS SHAPE OUR LIVES
Dr Monica Vermani is the author of A Deeper Wellness, Conquering Stress, Mood, Anxiety and Traumas.
Name: Monica Vermani.
I am: East Indian, Hindu Punjabi by cultural background. The name Monica is of Latin origin, derived from the word monere, which means to advise. Saint Monica was born in 331 AD in present-day Algeria. She is considered the mother of Saint Augustine, one of the greatest Christian thinkers and theologians of all time. As his mother, she was acknowledged for the spiritual guidance she gave her son.
Currently: I have a new book out. A Deeper Wellness, Conquering Stress, Mood, Anxiety and Traumas was years in the making and represents the culmination of my 25+ years of experience in the field of mental health. In it I introduce the core themes and struggles I have worked with for decades. Through 18 chapters – or life lessons – I provide ideas for healing and betterment. These themes are universal, and apply to everyone, across all age groups. A Deeper Wellness is also a wellness workbook which guides users – as this is a book that people work with and use, I prefer to call its audience users rather than readers – through a healing process consisting of lessons and self-reflective exercises that challenge them to reflect on their lives and apply what they learn to their own healing and life. The first step to healing is awareness. A Deeper Wellness provides psychoeducation, life lessons, and tools to implement for a better quality of life.
My life: I am a clinical psychologist specializing in treating trauma, stress, mood, and anxiety disorders. I am also an author, in-demand public speaker, and mental health advocate. In over 25 years of clinical practice, I have successfully treated thousands of patients through supportive psychotherapy, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), eye movement desensitization reprocessing (EMDR), breath body mind (BBM) practices, mindfulness meditation, mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR), and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT).
I am a regular expert commentator/contributor to online and print media outlets, and TV, radio, and podcasts, including Forbes Magazine, CNN Healthline, Psychology Today, InStyle Magazine, Parade, HUFF-POST, Martha Stewart, Fast Company, Oprah Daily, and many others. Think About It!, My UofT TedXTalk is about understanding and conquering negative thinking and self-limiting narratives and beliefs. It is available for viewing worldwide on the TEDx Talk YouTube channel. I plan to release a Masterclass related to Think About It! in Spring 2024.
The clinical psychologist in me wishes: That we could understand the power of our thoughts! Thoughts are powerful things. Everything that has ever been created, imagined or built, started with a thought. Just as thought has shaped our world, good or bad, our thoughts shape our lives. We need to pay attention to our thoughts. Creating the life we truly want and deserve is about replacing negative thoughts with more positive, healthy, and adaptive ones.
My best advice for healthy relationships: The most important relationship you will ever have in life is the relationship you have with yourself. In order to love others, we must first love ourselves.
My top tips to live well:
Prioritize self-love: Each day show yourself love. Self-love will reflect in your subconscious mind and enhance your confidence level.
Make a gratitude list daily: Be thankful for what you have and stop focussing on what you lack.
Your symptoms help you change, learn, and grow: Don’t influence your mind by unnecessary things that can reduce self-progress. Pay attention to your feelings and seek help when your symptoms are unmanageable.
Learn from positive role models: Successful people have many brilliant things that we can learn from them. We are here to grow and learn from each other.
Use your time wisely: Minimize distractions, social media, and gossip. Schedule your time wisely, and remind yourself of your goals.
Stand out from the crowd: Be authentic. Connect to your authentic self and live fully and completely in your truth. Don’t be afraid to unfollow the rules and get out of your comfort zone to create the life you want and deserve.
Other peoples’ opinions of you are none of your business: Your opinion of yourself is the only one that truly matters. Stay true to yourself and focused on your goals.
Avoid procrastination: Stick with something for 15 minutes before giving up. The hardest part of any incremental task is getting yourself over the hump of the anticipatory anxiety. Push past those first 15 minutes, and you will see results.
Make your faith bigger than your fear: Life only gives you what you can handle. Encourage yourself to believe in yourself and your ability to handle whatever comes up.
Create a positive mantra. Whether it’s a goal, a feeling you want to achieve, or a sentence that makes you happy, create a positive mantra and repeat it whenever you start thinking or speaking negatively to yourself. “I am capable” is a good starting point!
Try meditation. Do one thing with complete presence. Deep breathing and bringing your awareness to the present moment alleviates negative memories and forecasting.
Bring forth positive change in your life. Pick something small you have wanted to change and make it happen. Remind yourself that you are capable of great change.
Set both short-term and long-term goals. Working toward something is the culmination of self-empowerment and growth and also helps you maintain interest in life and reduces sadness, discontent, and loss of connection!
More about Monica: At www.drmonicavermani.com.
Be a Desi Star! If you’d like Desi News readers to ‘meet’ you, call 416-695-4357 or e-mail desinews@rogers.com to arrange a photo session! It’s fun and it’s free!