HELLO JI!

WHAT’S YOUR TIPPING POINT?

There’s much debate in the media about what constitutes a “decent” tip and whether one should have to tip at all when we pay for the food or the service itself. Image credit: PATRICK TOMASSO on Unsplash.

Back in the day in India, the “going rate” for wedding gifts was cause for much anxiety. You couldn’t afford to make a mistake. Give less and risk being categorized cheap. Give too much and be dismissed as an “NRI showing off her dollars”.

Now we call each other to confirm that everyone is shelling out more or less similar amounts for a school reunion.

I remember the time a bunch of us skipped a few classes at university to catch a movie. As cash-strapped students, we had barely enough to cover the bill for the dosas we went for after the movie. Scrounging for chillar, as small change was called, we left a tiny tip and hurried out before the waiter could catch us in the act. As we stepped out, however, a friend asked, “Who feels like a paan?”

We didn’t have the money, someone reminded her. She gleefully held up change – that we had left as a tip. “It was such a small amount, the waiter would have been mad anyway,” she said, justifying her action.

There’s much debate in the media about what constitutes a “decent” tip and whether one should have to tip at all when we pay for the food or the service itself. The prices of everything are on the rise and the suggested tips are beginning to border on the ridiculous. Are customers on the hook for shoring up low wages in certain sectors? And what is the going rate, anyway? Should someone who brought a glass of water to your table at a buffet be given as much as someone who braved icy roads to deliver a hot pizza to your door?

So have we reached a tipping point, as it’s being called? “We’ve coined terms like ‘tipflation’ and ‘guilt-tipping’,” wrote Emily Stewart in Vox.

Here’s another way of looking at it.

Our friends Ritu and Pankaj had taken us out for dinner. Pankaj, as he is wont to do, engaged the young girl who brought us the menu in a friendly chat and she described the courses she was studying as an international student.

When the bill came, he added an extremely generous tip and wished her all the best in her studies.

“So many young people rely on tips as they don’t make a living wage,” he said, heading off any discussion..

Here’s another story on tipping. During a recent lunch at a place that serves an unlimited thali, young wait staff came by with repeat servings of an already lavish spread. One girl offered dessert. I hesitated, and then giving into temptation, said, “A small helping of mohan thaal, please. A chhota (small) spoon!”

She dropped a large dollop on my thali. “A bada (large) spoon!” she responded with a smile.

I can recall so many more interactions with people, young and old, who wait tables, who cut our hair, or provide other services.

Here’s a tip. Maybe you don’t have to tip. But if you can, do. Specially if it’s for a sweet girl who serves you an extra large helping of dessert with a smile.

Shagorika Easwar